Laconic, Languorous Little Man

How they met and married must have been the result
Of some fiendish bet, for no two people could have
Been any different than this woman and trepid man;
She was quite agrestic, in fact, not at all domestic;
He was nothing spectacular, being an homuncular man,
Both in size and spirit, whose laconic nature provided
Something of a tonic to cure the recurrent histrionics
Of his hoyden wife, whose natural constitution seemed
So kitsch-laden! No wonder, then, that this poor man
Was perpetually languorous, which was a bit dangerous
To his fragile health; but crude and rude as she could
Sometimes be, she was linchpin to their shared wealth,
So damn his health! He was famous for being almost
As abstemious as an ascetic while she was indulgent
And quite ebullient in diet and riotous socialization,
Which counted a great deal toward his languid station
In a life rife with hesitation, defined by truncation;
So his persistence in existence was largely defined
By frustration built upon the foundation of ill-fated
Consummation pre-planned in hell to be his damnation;
But what is he to do but smile and wile away the time?

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